Keeping the blogosphere posted on the goings on of the world of submarines since late 2004... and mocking and belittling general foolishness wherever it may be found. Idaho's first and foremost submarine blog. (If you don't like something on this blog, please E-mail me; don't call me at home.)

Friday, November 24, 2006

The "Nuclear Power Bible"

A former USS San Francisco (SSN 711) Sailor has a great website, Vulpes Libertas, that a reader just brought to my attention. In addition to a section on what happened to SFO since the grounding, he has a section of "Submarine Art" that boat Sailors will appreciate (but others may find offensive). I personally liked the in-progress "Nuclear Power Bible". Some excerpts:
OI 1.1 The Creation
1.1-1 In the beginning was Rickover. Submarines were void and without form and the spirit of submarines patroled over the surface of the deep. And Rickover said "Let there be reactors", and there were reactors. Rickover saw the reactors were good and there was turnover and watch section clean-up, the first watch.
1.1-2 And Rickover said "Let there be two conditions, one to govern in port, and one to govern at sea". Rickover saw that the conditions were good. The greater condition he called condition two, and the lesser condition he called condition one and there was turnover and watch section clean-up, the second watch...
...1.1-6 And Rickover said "Lets make watchstanders in our image, male and also other males", and Rickover created watchstanders. Rickover saw that it was good and there was turnover and watch section clean-up, the sixth watch.
1.1-7 And Rickover looked at all he had created and saw that it was good, then he made procedures because he damn sure never rested any day of the week. And there was turnover and watch section clean-up, the seventh watch.
And...
4.1-1 Chief Abraham
Chief Abraham had no petty officers in his division. Rickover came to Abraham and said "At this time next year, I will give you a petty offcer". So at the appointed time, a petty officer arrived in Chief Abraham's division, his name was PO3 Issac.
4.1-2 Rickover came once more to Chief Abraham. "Chief, I want you to sacrifice Issac, your only petty officer, at a critique." So Abraham took his only petty officer out into the wardroom and there prepared a critique. PO3 Issac asked his chief "Who is in trouble? What incident are we critiquing?". "Rickover will provide," said chief Abraham unto Issac.
4.1-3 Chief Abraham grabbed PO3 Issac to throw him into the wardroom, but an Engineer sent from Rickover stayed his hand. And there, caught in the passageway was a RAM 3400. Chief Abraham took the RAM 3400 and placed in the wardroom and it was sacrificed at the critique.
Some good stuff. I'm looking forward to his next installment, "The Poopy-Suit of Many Colors".

1 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

He's sure to add:

Uranium begat neutron precursors; neutron precursors begat neutrons; neutrons begat fission.

11/24/2006 4:45 PM

 

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