I Got My First Tattoo Today
For over 21 years on active duty in the Navy, I was able to avoid the temptation to get a tattoo. Today, though, I got my first one (or three, depending on how you look at it). They're small -- just one needlepoke worth of black ink -- and spaced around my abdomen, one on each side and one just below the bottom of my sternum. They're alignment marks for the radiation therapy I'll almost certainly start in the next couple of weeks. This will hopefully help cure the stomach cancer I have that was discovered 15 days ago.
I'm actually very lucky. While this is generally a really bad form of cancer, it was found very early. Normally, cancerous tumors at the gastroesophageal junction (where the stomach and esophagus meet) aren't found until the patient complains of pain, or the tumor grows so big that it blocks off the esophagus and you can't swallow anymore. Luckily for me, I vomited up some blood one morning, and figuring that was sub-optimal I went to our family doctor. He sent me to a GI tract specialist who stuck a camera down my throat and verified that an ulcer-looking thing had been bleeding into my stomach, but had stopped. We did a follow-up endoscoping 2 weeks later, and the doctor noted that it had grown significantly, and the biopsy confirmed cancer. Since then, I've had a couple of tests (one involved getting injected with F-18, which all you nukes should remember from having to learn about all the primary sample analyses), that show the cancer apparently hasn't spread from the main 1" diameter tumor site.
I'll go up to Seattle in the next couple of weeks (apparently, the only doctor who can do this surgery in the Northwest is there) for another test to see if it's spread to the lymph nodes, and based on those results we'll decide if I need radiation treatment in conjunction with chemotherapy first to shrink the tumor (followed by surgery), or have the surgery first followed by chemo. I really hope it's the 2nd option, since the radiation treatment will involve the GE junction getting zapped with 5040 rads of X-rays over a 5 1/2 week period; they say it'll be like the worst sore throat I've ever had (but it will last for several weeks), I'll be weak and nauseated, I won't be able to swallow anything, and they'll have to install a feeding tube into my stomach for me to pour my nutrients and pain meds into. Then, after 4 weeks off to recover, I'd go to Seattle for surgery to remove the tumor and surrounding tissue. Unfortunately, I'm not too optimistic the easier option will be feasible (my doctor's here think it's very likely it's spread into the lymph nodes), so that's why I got the tattoos today.
Needless to say, blogging may be erratic over the next few months. I don't intend to turn TSSBP into a cancer blog, but I find it seems to help me to talk to people about what's going on. If I do blog about it, I'll try to keep it at least somewhat entertaining and/or informative.
While I'm in Seattle, any chance any of my readers stationed on the USS Connecticut (SSN 22) or USS Jimmy Carter (SSN 23) can get your boat's initial manning Eng a quick unclas tour?
Update 1257 06 November: Thanks so much for all the prayers and good wishes. I'll be heading up to Seattle next Wednesday to take the tests on Thursday; we'll be staying with a friend in the Bangor area when not at the hospital, so if any old friends want to see us on Wednesday or Thursday night, drop me a line.
101 Comments:
You're in my prayers.
11/05/2008 9:43 PM
I'm so sorry to read this. I don't know you, but you're in my prayers.
11/05/2008 9:46 PM
I got interested in your blog because you were one of my favorite EL Tee's on the MTS 626. Sorry that this has to be my first post. I've had friends who have had similar symptoms and courses of treatment and they came out OK on the other side. Hang in there, big guy. You'll do fine.
11/05/2008 9:57 PM
Sorry to hear this, Joel. I'll definitely be thinking about you and your family.
Will you be driving to Seattle? If you are and you pass through Spokane, let me know!
11/05/2008 10:15 PM
I am glad that you caught it early. That should help your chances tremendously. I wish you the best of luck and will pray for you.
11/05/2008 10:17 PM
Wow Joel. I'm sorry to hear about this as well.
I hope it all goes well for you.
11/05/2008 10:26 PM
Mr. Bubblehead,
I hope it's Swedish hospital who is taking care of your treatment. My girlfriend underwent a kidney transplant there almost two years ago. Swedish is well known in both the northwest and the west coast for Kidney and heart transplants. They are also the most strike outfit for cancer treatment. So I hope that's the hospital you're going to.
I hope you're able to get a tour of one of the Seawolf class subs. I've only had the privilege of seeing one from afar while she was making her way out of the Puget sound while we were on the Bremerton Ferry boat heading to Seattle one morning roughly two months ago. One of my buddies reconized and identified the boat as it was passing us. The sub was making so much wake in the water, the ferry boat had to slow down till the sub passed us in the sound. I thought that was the coolest damn thing. I was only sorry I didn't bring my camera with me that day.
Nevertheless I too, will pray for you. When you have the time, I to respectfully request that you'll be good enough to keep your blog readers informed of your present condition.
It's clear that you have some difficult times ahead. In order to deal with all this shit, you might enjoy letting us know how you're doing. Alotta people will be thinking of you. I hope everything works out for the best!!
Thanks,
SSGT J. Casey
11/05/2008 10:45 PM
Joel,
I am so sorry to hear this and I will pass this news on to Dan via email. The USS CT is underway right now but will briefly be back in a few weeks before heading out again (can't be more specific for obvious reasons).
If there's anything we can do while you are in the Seattle area, please let us know.
11/05/2008 11:40 PM
I am sorry the hear your illnes. I have lost my grandma to this ilnness. I hope that the early discovery will help your healing.
Your are in my prayers.
11/06/2008 12:27 AM
I am very sorry to hear about this. I don't know you, but you seem like the kind of person who WILL beat this. I will keep you in my thoughts, and will will pray for strength and healing to help you through this.
11/06/2008 12:32 AM
You have my prayers, Joel. Please keep on posting something to keep us updated. Talk about whatever you want.
11/06/2008 5:33 AM
Joel:
Its your blog. Write about whatever you want.
We are here for you..
11/06/2008 6:07 AM
Ditto Ross, above. In fact, we're all interested in how your doing, so write about it when you're able.
My family and I will pray for you.
Hang in there, Joel. You're not headed for decomm yet, just dry dock. You'll be floating again soon...
11/06/2008 6:16 AM
Joel,
I am sorry to hear about your situation, and assure you that you will be in my family's thougts and prayers. My Mother always had a saying, "This too shall pass". With a positive attitude, I am sure you will be fine. I started reading your blog some time ago. My Brother was the CO of the CT, and your blog was my connection to his profession, and the submarine community that I know so little about for obvious reasons. He is still active and is back in Groton. That being said, I have always found your blog to be informative, as well as, enjoyable. The broad range of topics and the feedback has helped me learn about the sub community. Keep the Faith Joel.
11/06/2008 6:22 AM
In our thoughts and prayes!
the LaCouture family
11/06/2008 6:33 AM
You and your family are in my prayers as well. Your blog is my connection to the submarine community and although I don't know you personally, I feel as if I know you and many others through the postings here. Good luck to you throughout this experience, and I echo the others in our desire to know how your journey is coming. Thanks for taking your valuable time to keep this blog alive!
11/06/2008 6:39 AM
In our thoughts and prayers. Keep positive and beat it.
11/06/2008 6:54 AM
Okay, enough maudlin, time to handle this with submariner compassion!
---
Dude, when whatshisface gave you crap in the political spot comments about losing weight, you didn't hafta overboard on it! Get hot! And make sure to visit the boat *right after chemo* so you can freak out the crew setting off detectors at random...
11/06/2008 7:09 AM
Bubblehead,
Great that you caught it early. Like you I'm a friend of Scott and when he found out about his cancer he told all of us (and his students) to make sure we TAKE CARE OF OURSELVES.
We submariners, especially the agressive go-getter types, do a terrible job of listening to our bodies and taking care of ourselves. That perverse pride in lack of sleep and lack of personal care has unfortunately come back to bite many of us.
Please get well!
11/06/2008 7:11 AM
One more here sending you positive thoughts.
Medical science is way better than even 5 years ago. I know from personal experience. Many people are pulling for you and I hope that thought brightens your day when you need it.
11/06/2008 7:42 AM
Holy shit!
Dude, keep your head high, and for obvious chemo reasons, keep the sodium-hydroxide away from your other radioisotope therapy drugs... 8-|
I tend to have some pretty bad memories of my submarine. I'm not sure that the 'healing would occur' with a quick walk through of 21 man.
Good luck Joel, and God bless~
11/06/2008 8:04 AM
Wow... I really sorry to hear about this, Joel. But I'm glad to hear that you and your doctors caught it early.
Rest assured you're in my thoughts, too. And if blogging helps you deal with everything, don't worry about turning this into a "cancer blog." Navy always supports fellow Navy.
Stay strong...
11/06/2008 8:12 AM
Sorry to hear about this, Joel. I was on the 645 and 622. Keep a positive attitude! It goes a long way. I had kidney cancer 10 years ago and beat that. 3 years ago I was diagnosed with colon cancer and beat that. 2 weeks ago I was diagnosed with prostate cancer. Have my consult on Nov 12 to discuss treatment options. Probably radiation followed by chemo. At any rate, I have been blessed with excellent doctors and a family and God that cares. You will definitely be added to our prayer list. If you have any questions that I can answer for you, just yell. You've got a great website! I go to it everyday to get the latest.
Keep us posted on your path and condition.
God bless you.
11/06/2008 9:19 AM
Wow. This is not what I expected to read about today. Please post updates as you feel up to it. We're all concerned about you.
You'll be in my prayers. Best of luck in Seattle.. They've got some of the best there.
11/06/2008 10:48 AM
You and your wonderful family are in our prayers.
I've only had radiation (ocular melanoma) and rather interesting surgeries, not chemo, but it was very cool science and saved me.
Western medicine has come a long way in the last decade, so you might feel as if you've been keelhauled, but just keep breathing through the worst parts and you'll be okay. Remember to lean on your friends and family and let them help carry you -- it makes it *easier* for them to have things to do, to feel as if they're contributing to your success. Cancer is a team sport.
Best wishes, and please have one of your brilliant kids blog an update here if you don't feel like it, so we can focus our prayers, okay? --Sylvia
11/06/2008 11:19 AM
Sorry to hear this news. You've become one of my must read sites. I'll keep you in my prayers.
11/06/2008 12:08 PM
Joel,
Your very lucky to have caught the tumor so early. Really glad you didn't blow off the first warning signs as so many of us do.
I went through a prostate cancer scare seven years ago. Fortunately the biopsy turned out negative. These kinds of events really focus your thoughts on whats really important in your life. Tell us what ever is on your mind as you go through TX.
I'm pulling for you shipmate!
Keep a zero bubble......
DBFTMC(SS)USNRET
11/06/2008 12:09 PM
Bubbles, I was shaken by this news my friend. "and figuring that was sub-optimal". I'm glad to see you've retained a sense of humor about it which will be key in maintaining your mental and physical well being. You and I have had our differences but that doesn't mean I don't value your input. Please keep yourself up buddy cause we need your right-left bridge in the state. And as always, keep us posted.
11/06/2008 12:22 PM
Joel, this sucks. But your blogger community will stick with you, and by you, through it all and you will be well. Please do write about your experiences! It's not just what you write about which brings us here, it's YOU.
With affection and positive energy,
Jill
11/06/2008 12:27 PM
I will add my prayers.
11/06/2008 12:31 PM
Joel:
Hang tough, and know there are a lot of people thinking of you and praying for you.
Kevin Richert
11/06/2008 12:56 PM
Joel,
Let us know if there is anything we can do. Best of luck!
Tara
11/06/2008 1:11 PM
Best wishes for a full recovery.
11/06/2008 1:15 PM
My wife has the same tattoo as you, but it's on the sides of one of her breast.
My prayers are with you and now I am sorry I am such a jerk.
11/06/2008 2:16 PM
Joel - I hope and pray that all goes well. I can only repeat what everyone else has said - You will be added to my prayer list.
11/06/2008 2:18 PM
You're in my prayers.
11/06/2008 2:55 PM
Shipmate,
I'm praying for your full recovery!
Going deep...
Tom
http://www.dare2believe.com
11/06/2008 3:02 PM
Joel,
You know we are all behind you here and what ever you feel like posting we will all read it.
Know that you are in my prayers!
--Rich
11/06/2008 3:14 PM
Damn Joel! Sending karma cookies your way. Keep us posted.
(Nice job on the campaign video, btw.)
11/06/2008 3:34 PM
Holy Crap!
Best wishes, Joel. I'm sure you'll make it through with flying colors.
11/06/2008 3:46 PM
Well, shit this week is filled with wonderful news.
Go and beat that cancer, beat it into a bloody pulp.
I wish I could tell you how a relative beat cancer, but no.
11/06/2008 3:51 PM
Thanks for the update this afternoon Mr. Bubblehead. I'm glad you're able to stay with some friends here in the northwest thoughout your upcoming tests and observations. It's great to see that your spirits are high and soaring.
Looking forward to reading more soon.
Thanks, J.
11/06/2008 4:04 PM
Good luck.
11/06/2008 4:05 PM
Joel, shipmate. Keep your head up, sounds like you got good quick care. Always great news in medical situations.
11/06/2008 4:37 PM
Joel,
You're many of us here in the sublogosphere's inspiration.
We're praying for you, and looking forward to having yet another reason to be inspired by you.
If there is any slack to be picked up (I doubt there will be), this group will do it.
11/06/2008 5:24 PM
Joel
Like others have said here, the one positive may be that it was caught early. I wish you all the best in the tough days ahead. We will keep you in our thoughts and prayers.
Veemann
11/06/2008 5:55 PM
Joel,
Maintain an even strain, Shipmate. Rest assured you have many Boat Sailors pulling for you, and your family. You are all in our prayers. As for writing about it, go for it every darn day if it makes you feel better. What the heck, it's your Blog! Keep a Zero Bubble, ahead 1/3. Just take 'er easy.
11/06/2008 7:15 PM
holy moley joel! hey, i can wrap you in a poly bag and drop you down into the reactor tank here. the tattoos will have been in vain, but then, what the heck, nothing like being up with the times. of course, i'm not too sure i can guarantee a specific dose, or specific location, but just think of it as whole body therapy.
dang, buddy, all i can say for real is good luck, and i'm pretty sure you'll be able to tell us all about how the docs cured your cancer when it's all said and done.
11/06/2008 7:17 PM
Joel,
While I don't know you, I feel kinda like I do since I've been reading your blog religiously for the past year. I haven't always agreed with your posts, but certainly enjoyed reading and rebutting. From one SS qualified guy to another, you will be in my family's prayers - seriously. God speed!
11/06/2008 7:58 PM
Joel,
You are in the prayers of many around the globe. Here's to hoping you get well as soon as possible.
11/06/2008 8:47 PM
I'm sorry to here about your predicament. Having lost a sister, a grandmother and nearly losing other family members, I understand what you face and I hope for the best for you and your family.
11/06/2008 8:56 PM
Joel,
Not a submariner, but have worked with the boats the last 14 years or so. I'm the DEI at PSNS, so I'm reasonably close to Seattle. If you, your family or your folks need help with lodging, pls let me know. Got a 40' M/Y berthed at Brownsville near Keyport, or a 5th wheel next to the house near to Camp Union. It'd be an honor and aprivelege to help you out if'n I can.
ENCM(SW) Ret.
ENCM(SW) Ret.
11/06/2008 9:01 PM
Joel - so sorry to learn of your news but I know you'll win this battle. Stay strong. You are your family are in my thoughts and prayers.
Kevin
11/06/2008 9:36 PM
ENG-
And I say that with all respect due- Kick cancer's ass the way that only a Nuclear Qualified Submariner could.
My best friend from the boat had stomach cancer too. It's rough. I don't pray, but know that you've got some Specwar guys pulling for you too.
11/06/2008 10:03 PM
Thanks from all of us here for all the prayers and good wishes!
11/06/2008 10:56 PM
When my son was born with spina bifida last year I hung this verse above his NICU bed: "For I know the plans I have for you," says the Lord, "plans for your future and not for harm, to give you a future with hope." (Jeremiah 29:11) Yesterday I saw my son stand on his own, something the doctors thought might never be possible. God answers prayers. All our prayers are with you, and we're also a family in Bremerton should you need us.
11/06/2008 10:58 PM
Joel..
You are in our thoughts and prayers..
Hang in there Jayhawker
11/06/2008 11:23 PM
I'm so sorry, Bubblehead. You have a wonderful perspective on the subjects on which you write, and I very much enjoy your blog.
Best wishes to you as you embark on your odyssey of healing. Your sense of humor and inherent goodness will serve you well.
Again, all the best to you and your family.
11/06/2008 11:32 PM
Joel - Sorry to hear about your illness, but best of luck. I've heard that nukes make good patients because they are so thorough and meticulous about their treatment. I know that you'll do well - you'll be in my prayers.
RAM
11/06/2008 11:33 PM
Most definitely praying for you and your family.
11/07/2008 12:19 AM
I will definitely add you to my prayers. I've been following your blog for awhile (I think I might have first found it when doing a search for DH's sub ... he's on the Boise). So glad they caught it early. Best of luck in WA. God Bless!
11/07/2008 1:00 AM
ENG (Joel),
Best of luck. If you need anything, please ask.
Derek Murray
Shipmate from SSN 23
11/07/2008 4:06 AM
To paraphrase Talladega Nights:
MAKE CANCER YOUR BITCH!! Kick its ass!!
11/07/2008 7:04 AM
Joel,
You are in my thoughts and prayers. My mom had stomach cancer and is doing great ten years later, so keep fighting.
Sandy
11/07/2008 8:47 AM
Joel, you have my good thoughts as well for a quick recovery.
11/07/2008 9:55 AM
So sorry to hear this. We'll be praying for you. Best of luck!
11/07/2008 10:44 AM
Joel,
I'm glad you caught it early, son. Hell, you are way younger than me and NUCON still didn't kill me, so I feel better than Cancer won't derail you. You're tougher than most, son. Don't ever give up the ship. (And you know what I mean)
Good luck Joel. My prayers and best wishes go with you to the docs every day. And let us know, now that you've broken the tattoo taboo, when we can all see the lovely mermaid on your back someday.
God bless.
Subsunk
11/07/2008 12:49 PM
You'll be in my prayers, Joel. Glad to see you're so positive about it, that's probably the best medicine there is.
Byron
11/07/2008 6:19 PM
Oh, Bubblehead, I'm so sorry. I will be thinking of you.
11/07/2008 6:31 PM
Been thinking about you again today, hoping for the best and knowing you will conquer.
You survived (and thrived) over 20 years in the nuclear navy, including significant time on a fast attack in the shipyard.
This cancer will be beat - I know it
Submarines once, submarines twice...
11/07/2008 8:57 PM
Kick this things ass, get a real tatoo, and get yerself to the next milblogs conference.
(Just kidding about the tatoo.)
11/07/2008 9:15 PM
Unbelievable news! As an active duty submariner with family in Boise - read your blog often - always gives me great insight. Our many prayers are with you. Keep Charging! Get well soon!
11/07/2008 10:08 PM
My thoughts will be with you and your family.
I hope that you can get a tour of the 22. That is one great boat and an excellent crew. Be proud that she is the fastest boat out there! If all had gone to plan, I'd still be proud member of her crew.
I wish you an uneventful recovery.
11/08/2008 8:23 AM
Joel,
We'll add you to the prayer list.
Rotorhead just went through his treatment this year .... you're not alone.
11/08/2008 9:03 AM
I wish you the best of luck and hope for a positive outcome. My thoughts and prayers go out to you and your family.
11/08/2008 9:38 AM
Add me to the list of those praying for you. I'll be growling heaven 'til my wrist freezes up. Start thinking now about what to that tat into when you've kicked this thing. (I recommend a lovely tri-blade magenta.)
11/08/2008 8:06 PM
I will be praying as well. My ex-mother-in-law dealt with stomach cancer a couple of years ago and came through it fine.
11/09/2008 1:46 AM
Keep your chin up kiddo.
Write about whatever you want. It does help.
11/09/2008 9:46 AM
Good Luck, Phibian posted the news. LBG
11/09/2008 2:04 PM
Joel, I am sorry to hear it, but I know you will kick its ass. You will be in our thoughts and prayers, and perhaps a toast or two.
Good luck, brother.
11/09/2008 2:17 PM
Joel - you will win this battle just like you have met danger and triumphed before.
11/09/2008 10:34 PM
I have just finished my 6th week of radiation. Three more weeks to go. You can do it, keep the faith and fight the good fight. I still run everyday but have a strict diet and drinking schedule to get me through the treatments. Good luck and many years of blogging await you at the other end of the this storm you are going through. Tally Ho!
11/10/2008 5:09 AM
I always knew boat food was dangerous.
Keep up the fight.
11/10/2008 11:24 AM
Just found out about the need for some Spiritual Warfare from Laughing Wolf on Blackfive.
I've got you on my prayer list as Joel Bubblehead. I thought maybe that might get a little grin from you. Anyway, you will be mentioned several times a day.
11/10/2008 7:29 PM
You are in our prayers. My husband was a bubble head too. God Bless!
11/11/2008 5:27 PM
My friend Rich sent me to your site to wish you well. Cancer is a devil. I firmly believe that God never gives us more than we can handle, so you must be one of his strong, brave types.
Take care and write what you want. We read because you write not because of what you write.
P.S. I saw a really great bumper sticker for breast cancer awareness: Save the tatas!
11/12/2008 8:41 PM
Joel,
Found your site through a Google search and read your post. I'm a 5 year survivor of stomach cancer and like you mine was caught early. I'm keeping my finger crossed that your lymph nodes are clean.
I wish you the best in your treatment and if you ever want to talk to someone who has been through it, I more than willing to do so. One of the frustrating things for me when going through the process was that no one else I encountered has stomach cancer. Sure I had things in common with cancer patients but know one else knew the specifics of what I was dealing with. If that support would be helpful, let me know.
God bless,
Julie Anne
11/13/2008 3:40 PM
Prayers going out for you from here as well. If the number of good people pulling for you is any indicator, you should come thru this right as rain. All my best to you, and your family. Hold each other close.
11/13/2008 6:15 PM
I hope you're able to get a tour of one of the Seawolf class subs. I've only had the privilege of seeing one from afar while she was making her way out of the Puget sound while we were on the Bremerton Ferry boat heading to Seattle one morning roughly two months ago.
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