Keeping the blogosphere posted on the goings on of the world of submarines since late 2004... and mocking and belittling general foolishness wherever it may be found. Idaho's first and foremost submarine blog. (If you don't like something on this blog, please E-mail me; don't call me at home.)

Saturday, September 23, 2006

To Tom Lehman: A Humble Suggestion

As I turned on the TV this morning to see how the Ryder Cup was going, I knew deep in my heart what I was going to see: Euro-weenies beating up on Americans. It was as I feared. How is it that the American team, with the three best players in the world, consistently gets beat by a bunch of Europeans who have to take tea breaks all the time?

The more I thought about it, the more I realized -- Europeans are just better at this "team" thing than Americans are. Then, the solution hit me -- each team Captain is allowed to pick two players to round out the team, in addition to the top ten guys in the standings. The American captain, Tom Lehman, chose a couple of golfers to fill out the team -- despite the fact that the team already had 10 golfers. What he needed to choose were people who knew about team play already -- NFL linebackers. Just imagine how well the Americans would do if Sergio Garcia knew that Ray Lewis was a threat to tackle him every time he stepped into the tee box or lined up for a putt? Would Colin Montgomerie be as likely to hole a chip shot if he knew Brian Urlacher was about to jack him up? I think not...

This year's Cup is probably already a lost cause; we need to start preparing for 2008, when we can show the world what America does best by showing Euro-golfers that "pain" is more than just getting hit in the crotch by an errant shot.

Update 1056 24 Sep: Jeez, we suck.


Post a Comment

<< Home