Keeping the blogosphere posted on the goings on of the world of submarines since late 2004... and mocking and belittling general foolishness wherever it may be found. Idaho's first and foremost submarine blog. (If you don't like something on this blog, please E-mail me; don't call me at home.)

Thursday, June 02, 2005

This Is So Wrong...

Strategy Page has an article up on "What Really Happened to the Submarine Kursk" on their "Military Jokes" page (bad word warning...). Excerpt:

Transcript of Portions of the Kursk Log

Captain: Is the new fire control Windows OS installed yet, Comrade?
Seaman: Almost Sir. We just need to finish filling out the registration card.
Captain: Excellent. Soon we will be able to point and click our enemies into oblivion. [evil laughter in background]
Seaman: Comrade Captain! It is booting! Look, it says 'Preparing to run Windows for the first time'.
[long pause]
Seaman: Arrgh! Sir, it wants me to reboot again. That makes the 27th time.
Captain: Hmmm. This is not encouraging. Go ahead and reboot again.
Seaman: Aye aye, Sir.
[another long pause]
Seaman: Captain, it is up again. It says it found new hardware . . .. A CD-ROM drive and that it needs drivers.
Captain: Where are the drivers?
Seaman: On the CD-ROM.
Captain: You are joking, no?
Seaman: No Sir.
Captain: Reboot the damn thing again. I am starting not to like this Windows.
[another long pause]
Seaman: Sir! It is back! It says it found the Gorby2000 Torpedo and is looking for the device drivers. Do we have a driver disk?
Captain: I do not think so.
Seaman: I will tell it to use the default drivers.
[another long pause]
Seaman: Crap. It wants to reboot again.
Captain: How many times are we going to reboot today? This is taking forever. Our hull is going to rust out before this works.
[another long pause]
Seaman: Sir! It is up and this time it is not asking for anything!
Captain: Really? No device drivers? No registration cards? No user profiles?
Seaman: No Sir. I think it is ready.
Captain: Good work comrade. Now click on the fire control icon and let us see how this works. Seaman: Clicking now, Sir.
[another long pause]
Captain: Why does the fire control screen have a dancing paper clip on it?

While it's actually pretty funny (I've seen similar stories where the Starship Enterprise disables a Romulan warbird by loading Windows 95 into the Romulan's main computer) I'm uncomfortable with people making fun of the deaths of fellow submariners. I should probably be less sensitive...
Anyway, to make up with providing the link to the joke, I'll link again to a Kursk Tribute page I found. While the Russians were, and probably will be again, our adversaries, most submariners still have respect for each other across national lines, and mourn whenever one of us, serving whatever flag, is lost to the sea...

Going deep...


Anonymous Anonymous said...

Respect: yes, mourn: no. I don't believe that we should mourn the loss of our adversaries. To mourn is to regret the loss. We cannot regret the loss of a respectable enemy unless we forget why they are the enemy and why it is our task to cause them casualties. We can, however, respect them for their sacrifice.

6/02/2005 11:43 AM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

And... that joke is sorta disrespectful.


6/02/2005 11:44 AM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

It may be sorta disrespectful, but it's also pretty funny.

6/02/2005 4:04 PM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey - how come RM1(SS) gets caps, but my signature is always in lower case?

6/02/2005 4:05 PM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Sorry rm1, I get caps because I don't have an account and I don't log in. I just sign in the text box. That's why it says "Anonymous says..." at the top.


6/03/2005 10:31 AM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hmmmmm... Webby, I sent this to you complete with pics a few weeks ago!?! Did you delete before reading?

6/08/2005 9:04 PM


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