Keeping the blogosphere posted on the goings on of the world of submarines since late 2004... and mocking and belittling general foolishness wherever it may be found. Idaho's first and foremost submarine blog. (If you don't like something on this blog, please E-mail me; don't call me at home.)

Saturday, July 01, 2006

Movie Review: Superman Returns

SubBasket, DeepDiver, and I saw "Superman Returns" on Friday night, and had three quite different reactions. SubBasket, a [redacted] year old wife and mother, thought it was really good. DeepDiver, a 14 year old boy, thought is was pretty good. And I thought it was probably one of the worst movies I've seen in a long time.

Please note that I didn't dislike it because they weren't "pro-American" enough. It just wasn't a good movie -- I wasn't inspired to care about the characters, I was bored during the long breaks between action sequences, there was hardly any humor, and it didn't have nearly enough explosions. I'm willing to suspend disbelief when I see a superhero movie, but this one went way out into left field. For example, Superman's ability to fly has always been due, I've assumed, to his incredibly strong leg muscles. Here, he just has an innate ability to hover -- what's up with that? This new Superman has a little too much of a weird "stalker" quality about him that I'm sure makes him more "vulnerable" for that portion of the movie-going public who look for hidden sensitivity in brooding, dangerous men. I just want them to beat up bad guys while engaging in witty repartee.

I admit that I might be wrong about this movie -- girlfriday liked it, but she's a known person of gender. I'm going to split my rating up into two parts: as a movie to take your (female) date to, I'll give it a 3 out of 5. As a guy movie, I'll give it a 2 -- two middle fingers, boldly extended.

(Disclaimer: I was in a slightly bad mood going into the movie because the theater's ticket office didn't have their credit card system working, so I had to use the ATM in the lobby to get cash to pay for the tickets, and I had to pay a $1.50 service charge there plus whatever my bank's going to charge me for using an off-network ATM, and on top of that the theater wouldn't even comp me any snacks when I complained to the manager about the extra charge in hopes of getting free stuff. Plus, I had to wait in the ATM line behind a couple who didn't know how to use the ATM, so we missed the showing in the digital theater. Of course, the movie probably would have only sucked in more vivid color with the digital projector.)

Update 1539 01 July: Michelle Malkin didn't like the movie much, either.


Blogger ninme said...

You know what turned me off long before the reviews? His eyebrows. I just can't get over the man's eyebrows.

7/01/2006 12:15 AM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Sorry you were so disappointed, Bubblehead. I do see your point of view in those long non-action sequences, however, and as cool as that would've been, and at the cost of character development, a movie filled with Superman heroics from start to finish would have been too much.

Putting on my comic book hero expert hat on for a moment here, originally, Superman did not fly, but leapt. So you are partially correct here. But early on, Seigel and Schuster morphed that into an ability to fly and even hover at will, all part and parcel of his powers from our good 'ol yellow sun.

I wasn't comfortable with him "eavesdropping/stalking" Lois Lane either. I always thought Supes would have the integrity to not abuse his powers like that. Maybe this is the way the director showed Superman's "emotional, vulnerable" side. Kinda creepy to me. I agree with you on the "beat up bad guys while engaging in witty repartee" part.

Check out my blog review of SuperMan Returns - I saw it last week in a free sneak preview at the sub base. Maybe that colored my opinion, that and the fact that I am a comic book fan clouds my judgement here. I liked the movie, and I'll probably go see it again.

7/01/2006 8:05 AM

Blogger Skippy-san said...

MM Does not like it? That is probably high praise in indeed.....

7/01/2006 6:41 PM

Blogger Eagle1 said...

I give it a B-.

Kevin Spacey does a nice job.

7/01/2006 10:33 PM

Blogger girlfriday said...

I'm very sympathetic to the complaints about the movie's pace. It wasn't the strongest superhero movie but for reintroducing the franchise, I think it worked.

Spacey bombed as Luther. Wow did he bomb.

7/02/2006 1:07 AM

Blogger Skippy-san said...

Its hard to believe Spacey as the ad guy IMHO......

7/02/2006 6:45 AM

Anonymous Lisa Gilliam said...

I was not about to waste my hard earned money on junk,first these bozos made Superman a homosexual and then besides all the other horrible things is that he is a Globalist(that is a bad word as far as I'm concerned)and Bubblehead being that I'm old wschool when it comes to Superheroes,what does ending this movie title with the valley girlsih sounding and all that other stuff mean?!

7/02/2006 5:54 PM

Blogger lawhawk said...

I saw the movie last nite with Mrs. Lawhawk. We both went in expecting a popcorn flick with action. We both had followed some of the pre-movie hype about the whole alteration of the motto, and a few other things.

Our combined reaction: it was a decent flick that could have been improved with trimming some of the beauty shots by about 10-15 minutes. Way too much time spent with panning and watching Superman fly and not enough other action.

The action sequences were done quite well.

Spacey chewed up scenery, but Parker Posey stole each scene she was in - she's a joy to watch.

The movie sets things up for the inevitable sequels.

I thought the motto change was actually an indictment on the media, as was a later jibe about journalists writing pulitzers - which got chuckles out of both of us.

But the real reason I'm writing is that I came across this and wanted your input -

Judge rules that USN can't use certain kind of sonar in upcoming naval exercise in Pacific.

7/03/2006 1:45 PM

Blogger Trickish Knave said...

Superman's ability to fly has always been due, I've assumed, to his incredibly strong leg muscles

Lost me on that one. I thought he could fly because he was near a yellow sun that gave him powers. Now, a ridiculous superhero with big leg muscles that gave him the ability to "fly" was The Hulk- able to leap across expanses of desert with a single leap.

Iawhawk, being stationed in Hawaii for hte RimPac games mans having to read and comply with the Marine Mammal Environmental rules the animal lovers lobby for. It is assinine and we sonarmen will use whatever the hell sonar we feel like,.

7/03/2006 3:21 PM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Superman Returns was one of the worst movies ever made. If fact, 'Four Nija Moms With Guns' was better. Brian Singer must die for that movie. In fact one day I'll find him and make him pay.

And those of you who are into comics.. will and should agree.

7/13/2006 7:26 AM


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