Keeping the blogosphere posted on the goings on of the world of submarines since late 2004... and mocking and belittling general foolishness wherever it may be found. Idaho's first and foremost submarine blog. (If you don't like something on this blog, please E-mail me; don't call me at home.)
A reader sent in a picture of his old Eng making his "departing" 1MC announcement:
What are some of your favorite announcements made by departing crew members as they left the boat for the last time?
posted by Bubblehead at 4:41 PM
I'm Joel Kennedy -- a married, 50-something year old retired submarine officer and esophageal cancer survivor with three kids who has finally made the transition to civilian life. Politically, I'm a Radical Moderate. (If you don't like something on this blog, please E-mail me. Don't call me at home.)
47 Comments:
"MM1/SS Chad Lee H****** departing. It sucks to be you."
His terminal leave was delayed a few hours.
4/05/2010 4:59 PM
We had a JO verify diver's tags, announce he was departing and climb up and dive off the sail. Needless to say, the command was not happy. Rumor has it, that it affected his follow on shore tour orders.
At least he verified diver's tags...
4/05/2010 5:10 PM
"The Artist Formerly Known as 'ANAV' Departing. Permanently." 1030, Sept. 10th, 2007, Pier S-1B, Pearl Harbor, HI. On a plane for home three hours later!
4/05/2010 5:12 PM
This is not a 1MC but funny anyway This young Sailor bought one of those old Navy pickups at an auction and on his last day he painted FTN on his tailgate. Well, his terminal leave was adjusted and the command did not buy that FTN meant Full Time Navy, lol.
4/05/2010 5:51 PM
A little more than this time last year, I was about to finish up with my first boat. I had a buddy, an FT2 who had finished his six years and was going home on 70 days terminal leave. He went to work for GE very shortly and you wouldn't believe what that happy bastard makes a year nowadays.
Anyway, we set him off on one of the tenders heading to Guam, so he could fly back to Bremerton and then drive home. As we pulled along side, he grabbed the 1MC and yelled loud & proud, "The Looooove Boat, soon we'll be making another run!" "Hey! It's been fun, Boys!"
It was the funniest damn thing as the XO just rolled his eyes and waved goodbye. FT2 is a good guy and was just aching to nail some skimmer pussy while on board toward home. Granted that didn't happen, but I wouldn't have been surprised if it had.
MT1(SS) WidgetHead
4/05/2010 6:01 PM
"IC1(SS) Frank T E*****, Plankowner, departing," from the topside watch while Frank leaned over his shoulder and played some blues on his harmonica.
4/05/2010 6:27 PM
I could barely see that guy. Was he a Sailor?
4/05/2010 6:27 PM
Faded right into the background, what was it, water?
4/05/2010 6:28 PM
Interesting; not once did we ever hear an intentional misuse or debasement of our 1MC or those of other SSNs (when there were almost twice as many in commission as today).
Since today's submarine navy also seems to have become a lot more rigid, one might guess such antics are expressions of stress relief by a few sailors who have felt their lives imprisoned for a long time.
Rather poor displays of professionalism for a service taking pride in recruiting and retaining some of the best and brightest. Still, not very many of them.
4/05/2010 6:39 PM
A very memorable from one of my guys separating:
"STS2/SS...correction, STS3/SS...correction, STS2/SS Erik X XXXXXX, departing."
He was busted down in a liberty port for an ARI for something that was never proven. He made PO2 back right before getting out. The XO wanted to light him up on the pier but technically there was nothing wrong w/ the announcement. You could hear the smirk in his voice & the crew got a big kick out of it.
The irony...He ended up coming back in because the ARI messed up his civilian career plans.
4/05/2010 6:44 PM
I left Ustafish at the end of decomm, and they had disconnected the ship's 1MC a couple of days before. So I unscrewed the mic and took it with me; it's on my desk at work.
-LT L
4/05/2010 7:01 PM
My boat left for WestPac about six weeks before I got out. Before they left, I took four weeks of leave in Maui, then flew back to San Diego for a week or two at Squadron then Seps.
Of course I had to wear dress whites for the final Seps checkout. Once my checkout was complete I went out to the parking lot to change into shorts for the beginning of a cross country drive to a nuke plant. While stripping off my whites, some LT yelled at me from across the street, "YOU CAN'T DO THAT!" I gave him the single finger salute. He just shook his head and didn't even bother crossing the street.
4/05/2010 8:48 PM
My boat was in shipyard PSNS, floating just outside of the drydock that housed it for so long. Still a lot of shacks and scaffolding topside.
I emerged from the weapons shipping hatch for the last time. The duty driver was in the van on the pier waiting to give me a ride to the White Pig Tavern. I told the topside watch that there was someone at the bow calling for him, and as he walked away and passed by the sail I keyed the 1MC, "Ding, Ding... Submarine-Qualified First Class Electricians' Mate (First/Middle/Last Name) Departing".
I could see the veins in the COB's forehead as he crossed the brow, while we sped away. When got to Seps at Sand Point in Seattle the Chief in charge of the TAD barracks had a message to make my time there miserable. I got a high five instead.
PW
4/05/2010 9:10 PM
It's me, holy s$#t, I'm famous.
4/05/2010 11:00 PM
No OLD ENG, you are not famous. Old CO.
4/05/2010 11:06 PM
Lt. United States Navy, (Last name, First Name), escaping!
Then there is the MMC (A-gang type) who noone liked, when he crossed the brow, grabbed the 1MC and made his departure announcement, which was smartly followed by sounds of cheering from below!
4/05/2010 11:12 PM
My last day, I'm burning bridges left and right. I announce myself off, throw my boots in the water, and get a drink. September 10, 2001.
Next day, I find myself back on the boat making preps to get underway while avoiding about half of my chain of command. Awkward.
4/06/2010 5:49 AM
Never burn a bridge...
4/06/2010 6:21 AM
I detached from my first boat in Charleston at the Weapon Station in 1981. I don't remember the 1MC announcement, but I'm sure I didn't make it for myself. We did a fairly banal "departing" announcement for everybody though. We didn't screw around with 1MC announcements, even in light hearted moments. I do remember walking down the pier, looking back at the boat and thinking what an enormous burden had just been lifted from me. It was a feeling of relief. It was the first time, but certainly not the last time, I realized how much pressure was involved in being a member of a submarine crew, even for the junior guys. It should never be taken lightly and we should always watch for the cracks in our Shipmates along the way. We are not very good at asking for help on our own.
4/06/2010 6:37 AM
"ANAV Departing, QMOW's: Plot, Label, DR!"
Words of advice on my retirement departure. Every QMOW of mine hated hearing me say that...until of course, each one, in his own little way, got saved by doing it.
Even my little "life" talks with guys would always include, plot label DR. If you follow that for whatever you do, life will always be a little better.
Jim C.
Retired ANAV
4/06/2010 7:12 AM
anon @0549:
My wife always says: Be careful...the toes you step on today could be connected to the a$$ you kiss tomorrow.
Jim C...wiser words never said! To the uninitiated, those words literally mean "Find where you are, then figure out where you're going".
4/06/2010 9:35 AM
I was in such a hurry to get off the 721 that I did not even think about it. I was afraid they were going to ask me to come back. The most memorable thing of that day was the CO asking me my plans in a last ditch effort to get me to stay. I told him I had been practicing my new job on watch a lot lately. Then I asked "you want fries with that?"
He kindly asked me to leave his stateroom.
MM2/SS ELT
4/06/2010 4:03 PM
I was leaving my first boat (A CSS-10 boat) in 1984, had been there for over four years. Pretty much ran Radio for the last few years. Had an excellent RMCS who let his boys handle the work. About four months before I left, he transferred we got a retread RMC who made Chief at about the 19 year point and an 18 year RM1 who couldn't get a clearance. Went from being a perennial Green C winner to being part of the pack.
Anyway, when I left my 1MC announcement was "RM1(SS) J.J. XXXXX departing, rig ship for reduced radio, y'all be cool." The y'all be cool came from Eddie Murphy in 48 hours.
CO and XO were mellow about it. The COB who had recently replaced a legend was squirrely. Didn't really care what he thought.
Probably wasn't the best or smartest thing to do, but at the time it felt good.
4/06/2010 4:57 PM
how about the one that was never done?
during the first deployment of 757, HM1 was found to be derelict and deficient. He didn’t have the necessary things onboard that an IDC should. he went to Mast over it and was removed from the boat at the next available liberty port. he was a plank owner, but didn't get his 1MC announcement. i believe it was a sonarman that was standing topside watch and specifically told him that he was NOT going to get called off because of his lack of integrity.
4/06/2010 6:18 PM
Not a ship departing, but when I departed recruiting duty and the COs final checkout.
I had just finished my COs checkout and said I am now relieved of recruiting duties and responsibilities. He said I could take off my recruiting cookie (badge). Next to his door was a small garbage can with a bunch of other recruiting cookies. When I departed I did not put my cookie in the can. He called me back and explained, since he was CO, all the fleet Sailors would throw their cookie in the can.
I said, "Not me, I want to hang on to it."
The CO asked me if I kept it because of the "fun" I had on recruiting duty?
I said NO. I was going to put it on my rack on the boat. So when I have those days after drills, inspections or any other crap and wish I wasn't on the boat, I said I will just look at my recruiting cookie and thank god I wasn't on recruiting duty anymore.
He didn't laugh and I have the cookie in my shadow box!
"My worst day at sea will always be better than my best day on recruiting duty" - Me!
STSCS(SS/SW) USN RET
4/06/2010 6:28 PM
Man, on the War canoe, we dont get to have any fun. The only one we got off was a LT called away "Johnny Five-Speed, Departing"
That made the COB so pissed, that now all departing MCs have to be approved by the COB.
When the Old XO left, everyone cheered...
4/06/2010 8:14 PM
Not a departing, but an odd MC announcement. During a crew turnover with both crews CO,XO,COB,ENG,EDMC in the wardroom... a 4MC was heard.
"This is a test of the 4MC from the reactor compartment, ELTs rule!"
You could hear the EDMC screaming into the RC from the control point.
Better to remain anonymous on this one.
4/06/2010 9:05 PM
A Nuc ET that was very vocal in his hate of the boat, the Navy, etc.. Had an announcement planned that the COB got wind of. He was escorted of with no cheer. About 2 weeks later, we got a letter from him. It was a picture of the front gate of Point Loma in the driver's mirror of his truck.
4/07/2010 5:08 PM
A memorable 1MC announcement on USS Sterett (DLG-31 at that time) upon the arrival of the gedunk truck on the pier at 32nd Street in San Diego: "Now the Roach Coach is making its approach."
The quarterdeck watch took that one in the shorts.
4/07/2010 5:11 PM
On the Gurnard in 92 we had a FT3(SS) getting kicked out over an issue of weight. This guy was huge. I was standing topside when he was departing. He made some kind of joke on the 1MC and then turned and ran. The Weapons Officer was topside in about 2 seconds. Seeing the Weapons Officer screaming and chasing this over weight guy down the pier, was one of the funniest things I have ever seen.
As for the negative comments regarding the misuse of the 1MC…If people didn’t do stupid things I would not have as many sea stories.
I am curious, does anyone know if the term “No Balls” is still used on the boats? 90 percent of the stupid things done while I was in were preceded by a “No Balls” dare.
ET2(SS)
4/08/2010 6:23 AM
I am curious, does anyone know if the term “No Balls” is still used on the boats? 90 percent of the stupid things done while I was in were preceded by a “No Balls” dare.
In my day, it was always "You don't have a hair on your ass!"
4/08/2010 9:54 AM
"No balls" is alive and well...
4/08/2010 6:34 PM
"Wakey, wakey!!!" in lieu of reveille.
Love it that "no balls" is still alive. It's funny to me that the big thing everybody has been saying the last couple of years is "that's what she said". Man, we were saying that on the Philly 10 years ago!!!
4/09/2010 2:05 AM
I know "no balls" was used ten years ago when I was on the ship.
I was an electrician on a nuke cruiser, and we would get bored from time to time. So one of us would go down to the mechanic's berthing area, stand in their lounge or something, and announce "You guys don't have the balls to tape me up."
Then run like hell.
We would always eventually get caught and taped up somewhere (the shaft, an overhead in a passageway, whatever), but it made for a lot of fun. :)
4/09/2010 12:00 PM
Let me set the stage first. Our engineer in the yards looked and acted like Pee Wee Herman (late 80's). Needless to say he rode a bicycle to and from the boat. So, on he last day he made the following 1MC; "Lt. D.D. V***** departing - now get my bicycle down !" For a few pounds of coffee, we had the crane crew fly his bike over the sail.
4/09/2010 3:38 PM
Great 1MC announcement: Secure the san pump! Secure pumping sans!
Does the topside still click the mike 4 times for unexpected visitors
4/09/2010 3:56 PM
I do remember the topside watch clicking the 7MC twice for CO/XO/Eng arrivals, and 4x for NR. Nothing better to get a tired SRO's attention.
4/10/2010 2:06 AM
We were moored inboard USS BUFFALO. So, when the CO crossed the brow, we announced, "Buffalo, crossing!"
4/10/2010 7:48 AM
Following the standard 1MC announcement, "there are no longer men working in the sail," someone broadcast after the topside watch set down the mike, "...only shorter men."
And my personal favorite...
During a drill set, a few minutes into the middle of a rather simple one, following an incomprehensible 2MC announcement from the EOOW (one of many during the set), the CO picks up the 1MC and calmly announces "Loss of the Engineering Officer of the Watch. Engineer, secure from the drill. Send the body to me."
WCC
4/14/2010 11:02 AM
Not a bubble head story, but one from a nuke, nonetheless.
I was divo on CVN 75 in NNSY during a(nother) yard period. I was somewhere outside of the plant, when I heard "The Capan is goin' ashore!" with a great amount of gusto and enthusiasm. Not "Truman, departing" Immediately the brick in my pocket lit up as the ANAV was sprinting to the fantail to kill a bos'un mate and ensign in hopes of saving his own life.
4/26/2010 1:43 PM
Not a departing but on an underway we had a COW with a pretty major accent / mumbling problem / stutter / speech impediment. One morning while we were making preps to do a BSP outside Bangor he made a 1MC to "Station the modified piloting party" - but what everyone heard was "station the motherf***ing piloting party"
4/30/2010 12:48 AM
This isnt a Departing 1MC, but the crew thought it was pretty funny. As a LT on the USS Kentucky, I was standing OOD and we got a msg that we needed to come to PD to copy msg taffic. We knew this would probably be a WSRT drill. When we got the msg, I grabbed the 1MC and announced (as I should have) "Man Battle Stations Missile for WSRT. Spin up all missiles". Except, I did it in my best Sean Connery voice from The Hunt for Red October (with extra emphasis on the "miss-isles"). The CO thought it was funny, but the XO looked like he was going to kill me when he got to Control. Since the CO thought it was funny, I didnt get into too much trouble.
1/01/2011 5:57 PM
From one of your targets: Not a departing announcement,just boredom. I had the 4-8 POOW and dying to return to conus from a Med cruise. At 0600 I announced in the cockyest voice I could muster.
"Reville Reville 10 days and a wake up till Mothers Day....ALL HANDS HEAVE OUT AN TRICE UP !" I had intended to go into the traffic and weather report for Little Creek,Va. But the growler was make way to much noise.
1/12/2011 12:43 AM
While undergoing overhaul in Bremerton, and after hearing the word passed all day for a particular yardbird rigger to report to his forman, the messenger of the watch on the quarterdeck finally had enough and passed the following over the 1MC.
"Now... Rigger Mortis please lay to the quarterdeck!"
2/09/2012 2:28 PM
My fav 1MC was one morning my LPO had the morning watch and the POOW passed the word ARthur W. Radford Arriving then four bells. Sounds correct for an arriving skipper right? Well two problems with this
1. The Radford had been decommissioned the day before
2. We were on the USS Peterson, and our CO was arriving.
MY LPO lost about 10 pounds of ass, and never allowed his POOW to pas sthe word on the 1mc again.
8/25/2012 12:38 PM
On a CVN out a sea for too long, the EOOW in 2EOS was a bored as the rest of us. It was not quite the mid watch when an EM brought his bag of toys (er, tools) to drill out and replace some stripped screws on a panel. In the tight space, the EM had to use the EOOW's desk to layout the parts and tools. The EOOW started to pickup and examine the tools -- pure boredom. The EM set down the drill and the EOOW picked it up and was soon pointing it at the other watchstanders and "firing" his "gun" until the lightbulb went off in his head. The EOOW grabed the Rx MC, keyed the mic, and announced, "This is a drill, this is a drill. This is a Black and Decker drill." Immediately followed by the sound of the drill going into the mic. A few seconds later the "J" circuit bell rang and we could only hear the EOOW's side of the conversation; "2EOS!. Yes, Sir. Yes, Sir. No, Sir. No, Sir. Right after watch, Sir." It turns out the Reactor Officer was catching up on paperwork and had the bitch box on!
11/09/2012 5:03 PM
Didn't do a 1mc leaving the GCM but when I was departing the Hunley to leave the Navy the 1mc at the stern was way too guarded so my buddies went to the helo deck above with a megaphone and a big ass gear that sounded just like the ships bell when struck with a hammer. They range me off like a vip and then scurried...
10/20/2013 11:18 AM
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