Keeping the blogosphere posted on the goings on of the world of submarines since late 2004... and mocking and belittling general foolishness wherever it may be found. Idaho's first and foremost submarine blog. (If you don't like something on this blog, please E-mail me; don't call me at home.)

Wednesday, April 02, 2008

PTU... More Than Just A Uniform, It's A Lifestyle

Last August, I made fun of the Navy's announcement that they were coming out with an official Physical Training Uniform, and snarkily implied that there were many more important things the Navy could be doing rather than come up with a T-shirt and shorts Sailors would have to wear when running around the base. Now that the new design has officially been unveiled, I'm man enough to admit I was wrong. First, let's check out what the new uniform looks like:

I'll be the first to admit that nothing says "Sailor" more than egg-yolk yellow shirts and blue shorts that are only about 5 years out of date, length-wise. Imagine you're an Al Qaeda terrorist planning to attack a U.S. naval base, when suddenly you're confronted with a whole formation of people running towards you looking like overgrown Cub Scouts. Will you be able to denonate your bomb? Of course not... you'll figure that any country that is rich enough to afford both long-sleeve and mid-length sleeve versions of an official PT uniform is too mighty to ever be defeated. You'd slink off in shame is what you'd do.

Now that our newest weapon has been revealed, everyone wants to know when we're going to put it to use. As always, the Navy website has the answer:
The new PTUs will begin hitting the Navy, with Recruit Training Command, in April, and will phase into the rest of the fleet between May and September. Sailors will be able to pick up their uniforms at Navy Exchanges around the world, costing $50 for the required two sets of PTUs.
I'm glad that our newest Warriors will be getting the uniforms first -- since they're also armed with BC glasses coming out of Boot Camp, they'll present a picture of fierceness that will render even the toughest jihadi helpless. All this for only $50 out of pocket? It'd be a steal at half the price!

But that's probably not your most immediate concern. You're surely asking yourself, "When will Admirals get these snazzy duds?" The story answers that question too:
Simultaneous with the official fleet rollout of the uniform, flag officers, commanding officers and command master chiefs will have the opportunity to purchase their PTUs by calling the Navy exchange uniform call center.
"It's called leading from the front," said Carroll when explaining why a commanding officer can get his PTUs right away. "The Navy wants to lead its Sailors from the top."
Mr. Carroll speaks the truth; the Navy wants to lead its Sailors from both the front and from the top. Anything else would be sodomy.


Blogger cheezstake said...

I almost fell out of my chair while reading that! Great report on the Navy's "highest" priority.

I guess the ship's store won't be selling many boat t-shirts any more.

4/03/2008 12:44 AM

Anonymous Anon E. Mooose said...

"the Navy wants to lead its Sailors from both the front and from the top. Anything else would be sodomy."

Pure comedy gold....Ha!

4/03/2008 3:23 AM

Blogger david said...

Ha! I guess I don't feel TOO bad about the Air Force's mandatory PT gear that came out about a year ago -- at least ours is gray and dark blue.


4/03/2008 5:38 AM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

They don't look any worse than any of the other stupid crap the Navy made me wear. Aside from the blue poopie suit, the rest of it was a sop to "tradition".

Yeah, flogging was "traditional", too.

4/03/2008 7:42 AM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Why why why?

I'm really discouraged by this. I'm trying to get back into the reserve now that I've finished my degree, and I dread the thought.


4/03/2008 8:17 AM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Joel, you may not have expierenced this,being on subs, but as I remember the ships laundry services on tin cans was not always up to the highest standards. It is not uncommon for things items to be lost, shredded, stained, ripped, etc.

Unless it has changed since my time, and God I hope it has, laundry for E6 and below was put into two huge bags (one for whites and one for all other colors) and then washed and dried without ever coming out of the bags.

The laundry was frequently shut down when potable water was short and whatever was not down at that time just waited and waited.

Oh well, at least I don't see any buttons on the new PTU. Anyone remeber the "button cruncher"?

Chief Torpedoman

4/03/2008 8:44 AM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I knew there was a reason I read this daily. That was a funny post.

4/03/2008 9:36 AM

Anonymous bullnav said...

Yeah, and I drill at Great Lakes.


I guess there is a good side to my recent achilles tendon rupture: I won't be doing a PRT for at least a year.

4/03/2008 9:37 AM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I hope those that make decisions don't put these uniforms on recurit posters.

4/03/2008 10:35 AM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Will you be able to denonate your bomb? Of course not..."

Correct, but for the wrong reason--you'll be rolling on the ground laughing so hard that the PT-obsessed will tromple right over you

4/03/2008 11:42 AM

Blogger FT2(ss) said...

Laundry bad on subs? I can tell you that when I was the Laundry attendant, I washed, and folded everyones clothing. Never did anything get ripped or torn. Our washers were actually pretty nice unless they where broken.

But damn, those are some fearsome PT uniforms.

4/03/2008 8:03 PM

Anonymous sonarman said...

My God, can't the Navy really fuck some shit up? Perhaps I am just too naive (even after 20 yrs on subs) to believe they could/would fuck up PT gear. And to think they worked on this for over a year. It bhoggles the mind.

Perhaps the boats can prescribe boat t-shirts, much the way they did for ships ballcaps before they became standard. Then at least the sailors can maintain a shred of dignity.

But I ask... Is deck/battleship gray colored pt gear too much to ask? I guess so.

But it could be worse... At least they're not mushroom, or sea foam green...

4/03/2008 8:10 PM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Some ring knocking Academy Grad chose those colors. Are they not the colors of the illustrious Trade School called "The Naval Academy"?

That Damn Good Looking Aganger From Iowa

4/03/2008 10:46 PM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

A PT uniform? Wow. When I got out in 1990, the only ones on my boat who worked out regularly were the half dozen of us who made up the boat's diver contingent and a sparse few others. The rest PTed only on PRT day. I remember senior enlisted guys performing the PRT "run" by jogging about an eigth of a mile then slowing to a walk for a smoke. 8-)

4/03/2008 10:48 PM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

If you can haul a red devil blower up an escape trunk (enlisted), carry a doughnut and a cup of coffee at the same time (chief) or write on a clipboard without stabbing yourself in the eye(officer) then you're in good enough shape to do your job.

Making you dress up in goofy crap is just another way to improve retention.

4/04/2008 7:03 AM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Does our leadership truly have nothing better to do with their time? Think about how much money the taxpayers could have saved if we retired the group of worthless masterchiefs that spent the past year working on this one.

4/04/2008 7:32 AM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

One advantage to the Chief Torpedomans post is that by washing everything in the laundry bag, everything eventually became a nice uniform gray color, no matter what color it started life as. Gave a whole ne meening to "haze gray, underway"

4/04/2008 8:13 AM

Anonymous em3 4 life said...

Yes, because that's what I want to look like, a chief inductee. How does me working out translate into requiring a uniform for it? What next, a specialized uniform for walking around in town.

4/05/2008 10:16 PM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Because you're property, EM3. The Navy wants every one (especially you) to know your ass literally belongs to them.

4/07/2008 8:25 AM

Anonymous Joshua said...

Its funny, I don't think this is a good idea...They're borderline daisy dukes for guys...I can't imagine how other countries navies are going to look at us now. Oh well it looks like we have more freedom now so I guess that means more speed. Right?

4/09/2008 7:09 AM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

slhsrI guarantee you that shortly afer the navy showed off the new uniform. One of the boats in the nest would wake to a new and improved submarine. Painted Bright orange on the Sail and the rest painted blue. It's amazing what you can do with 30 or 40 men

4/11/2008 12:39 PM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Did you guys hear about the new Navy Pajama and civilian uniform in the works? If you get caught wearing anything else other than navy issued liberty clothes or sleeping clothes, you are violating the UCMJ. What about the military standardized skivvies in the test phase? You can bet, whatever makes money is sure to affect our MWR!!

5/29/2008 11:50 AM

Blogger paulie said...

It's a step up from those blue with white lettering I was issued years ago. I'm glad I got out when I did, cause I would have to wear these things for the last 3 years of my career. This would give me 2 things to worry about. This ugly thing and finding the putz who designed them. I think that would force me to ask for an early retirement.
...Former YN2(SS)...

7/09/2008 7:16 AM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I've had to wear the old pt uniform, and at least this one's shorts don't look like they'll fit on males like female short shorts...

8/14/2008 4:59 PM

Anonymous contactos en madrid said...

For my part every person may read this.

9/28/2011 6:08 AM


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