Keeping the blogosphere posted on the goings on of the world of submarines since late 2004... and mocking and belittling general foolishness wherever it may be found. Idaho's first and foremost submarine blog. (If you don't like something on this blog, please E-mail me; don't call me at home.)

Tuesday, August 01, 2006

CSI: Boise

"Shows for next fall, they've already been namin'
"CSI: Boise" and "Touched By An Uncle" both sound pretty lame'n"
-- "Weird Al" Yankovic, "Couch Potato"

It seems that one of the newest fads on the Internet is helping the media uncover the secrets of baffling mysteries, as Patterico did with the LA Times when they wondered about the motivations of the guy who shot up the Seattle Jewish Center (his answer, arrived at by deductive reasoning: because the shooter is a Muslim who hates Jews).
I figured there's no reason why we can't expand on this trend, and help the police answer crime-related questions that seem to be baffling them. I'll start with this case here in Boise:
The parents of an 11-year-old Boise boy shot in the stomach with a pellet gun Monday want a 15-year-old boy accused of shooting the gun charged with a crime. Boise police have sent the case to the Ada County prosecutors office for review.
The 11-year-old was slightly injured by the pellets, which gave him welts on the abdomen, when his 15-year-old friend came over to show off his Airsoft pellet gun, police said. The boys are acquaintances and did not appear to arguing prior to the incident; it's unclear why the 15-year-old shot the younger boy, according to Boise police.
"The bottom line here is that this seems to be an intentional act," spokeswoman Lynn Hightower said Monday afternoon. "There is no report of a fight."
Hmmm, this is pretty curious. What could possibly cause a teenager to shoot his friend with a pellet gun when he's not mad at him? Could it be... I don't know... the fact that he's a teenage boy, and stupid stuff like that is what teenage boys do?

The Boise PD should should call me in to help them figure out a motive if they ever have a similar case, like teenage boys vandalizing a restroom in the mall on a Saturday night. I could totally help them figure it out.


Blogger WillyShake said...

BB gun battles! Yep ... *raises his hand as having participated as a teen* ... it was in bb gun battles that a piece of poetic justice comes about--the younger kid that everyone makes fun of for his Daisy Red Rider (pour 'em down the barrel, etc) now has THE distinct advantage of rapid-fire--the thing's nearly a machine gun if you apply WD40 to the lever!

Rule #1 of bb gun wars--you must aim below the waist! Though this is not fool-proof--once a friend dove forward (toward me!) as I was taking aim and I ended up imbedding a bb in side the frame of his glasses--right between the eyes!--an area which, in the early 1980's was heavily guarded by large plastic frames! LOL.

Thanks for the trip down memory lane.

8/02/2006 6:47 AM

Anonymous Unkawill said...

Oh God Yes, When I was a boy we used to do the same stuff Except we used to wear goggles, leathers and gloves for protection. 5 or6 neihborhood kids in a free for all. WHAT FUN.

8/02/2006 5:10 PM

Anonymous Crazed Social Worker said...

Your parents will be getting a call from Social Services for teaching and fostering 'dangerous behaviors.'

And Auntie Janet Reno will be the one deporting them to reeducation camps.

8/03/2006 8:52 PM

Anonymous Bikeboy said...

Go ahead and yuk it up, people, about this wild-eyed teen who shot his poor, innocent friend! (Leaving RED WELTS, according to news reports!)

But it's kids like this who grow up to shoot ADULTS with pellet guns! THEN we'll see if you're laughing!

8/04/2006 10:31 AM

Anonymous Cricket said...

*check sights, adjusts sight picture and pumps air rifle, takes careful aim and shoots bikeboy's tires.*

Uh huh. Whatever.

8/13/2006 9:22 PM

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